In my Define Your Foundations cohort program, I encouraged everyone to find their catalytic event, or the “trigger event” that causes people to seek you out then buy from you.
For some businesses it’s obvious:
“I’m launching a new program and need sales copy”.
“I’m getting laid off and want to negotiate severance / update my resume / put together a job search plan.”
“My accountant totally f’d up my taxes this year and I need a new one.” (Accountants, I’ve heard this from at least 5 clients this year. The time is ripe for solid accountants with good communications to get new clients.)
Those are clear external events. Something happens in the outside world, and suddenly the need becomes urgent.
For one of my clients though, the pattern wasn’t clear.
I was chatting with someone I re-met at the conference this weekend. We hadn’t talked at all about anything coaching related, and then:
“Always down to chat. 💜 and if there’s a more structured way I could collaborate with you, I’d be happy to. Ive been looking for coaching but just never pulled the trigger.”
She felt like clients simply materialized while she happened to be passing by.
No clear event that precipitated calling her.
Ah, but there is.
The Internal vs. External Event
Most people don’t wake up one morning and decide, “You know what would be fun? Spending money on growth and change.” Especially in a tight economic environment.
For someone to even consider hiring help, something inside them usually has to shift first.
The current way of doing things has to start feeling more costly than changing.
The cost may creep up quietly. It starts affecting their confidence. They’re tired of circling the same issue. They may not have a dramatic precipitating event, but they’re increasingly aware that staying where they are is costing them something.
And they’re starting to think about what’s next.
Now, if the momentum to move isn’t very high, they might get motivated for a week. They might read books, watch YouTube videos, get Claude to make them an action plan, and then go back to day-to-day life.
If the momentum is high, they still might not be proactively looking for support. Life is busy. People's attention is fragmented. The cost of not acting may be real, but the effort of acting still feels high, even when we know we need to do something different.
But... the person’s proverbial radar turns on.
Enter, the external event.
And now, when the right person shows up, they notice. Even if it's in a completely unrelated or casual context. Because like radar, they’re quietly scanning the landscape for the right next step.
You’ve probably experienced this as both a provider and a customer.
- You have a random conversation with someone, and it turns out: “I’ve actually been meaning to find someone like you.”
- You get an email or invitation that lands at exactly the right time.
- You see someone recommended by a trusted person and immediately book a call.
That’s how I booked my brand designer Sharon. I’d been dissatisfied with my branding for a while and “getting new branding” was somewhere on the list. Not at the top of my priority list but definitely up there.
Then I saw that my friend Amelia had used her for a rebrand, and I immediately booked a call and hired her a week later.
I didn’t compare multiple providers. I didn’t spend weeks researching.
My radar was already on, and once the step was made obvious and clear, I could immediately take action.
"Just passing through" actually works when someone’s internal radar is on.
They already wanted change, they already felt some friction. But they weren’t taking action yet.
Then, you show up in the room or in their inbox. And you’ve just made getting started so much easier: you might follow up, they don’t have to choose from many providers, you’ve made it easy to get started.
This is why staying in personal touch matters so much.
Because even if someone wants help, needs help, and has been thinking about getting support for months...
They still may never inquire, because life simply gets in the way.
What if appearing in the right rooms on a regular basis was a sustainable marketing strategy?
With Relationship Rhythms, it is. You go from sporadic outreach to a systematic but supportive approach to building and tending the relationships that lead to revenue.
Instead of waiting for the inquiry, you show up: sometimes simply helpful, sometimes invitational, but always proactively appearing instead of passively waiting.
Join before June 1 and you’ll also receive live bonuses: monthly Q&A sessions during the summer and CRM office hours to help you build the Relationship Rhythms approach into your own system — or use the one I provide. (Members, check the Circle community for your 10% discount).